In the last two months, since I discovered cancer had returned with a vengeance, I’ve really tried to look to God for my comfort and to release things to him. And most of the time, this works quite well. I truly feel he has given me peace, comfort and even joy in the process. I hope this is reflected in what I write.
But once in a while, I crash. Anxiety grips me by the throat and won’t let go.This week was one of those days. It hit particularly hard in the afternoon. I was alone and my heart was racing. I didn’t know what to do. I tried reading in my Bible. Nope. I tried reading another book. Nope. I prayed, I cried out to God for help. I was crying.
And God showed up so directly and quickly. First, we had received the Banner, our church magazine. As I quickly flipped through it, I noticed an article about Managing Emotions. One thing caught my eye: S.T.O.P
S- Stop
T- Take a break
O - Observe how I am feeling inside and outside and what it going on in the environment around me.
P - Proceed mindfully and prayerfully.
I decided I need to change the scene so I went outside. I could tell immediately that my heart rate was slowing down. I was walking and crying and trying to decide who I could contact to help me. (I have COVID so I can’t just show up at friend’s house or go somewhere) Immediately, I receive a text from Betsy, a long-time friend and former co-worker. “How are you? Do you need anything today”. I felt there could hardly be a more direct answer to prayer. I told her what was happening and could she come and walk with me. She left work and came. That helped a lot.
When she left, I found a package from a friend from college years, Lorelei. In it was a comfy robe, so soft and cute. It feels like being wrapped in a hug. She made it and packaged it up a few days before so that it arrived right when I needed it. She had no idea that God would have it come at just at the right time.
The rest of my afternoon was better. I put on my Pandora Christian station and wrapped Christmas presents. We videoed with one of our grandsons who was sick and then a bit later the two whose program we missed.
And yet, God continues on. This morning, I received a phone call from a friend and elder at church, Steve. He felt he needed to call and tell me a story. So he talked to me about his Sunday School class and it really did brighten my day.
There’s a song by City Alight - Jesus, Strong and Kind. This has been my theme song, the one I return to the most. You can always run to Jesus, Jesus Strong and Kind. Jesus came as my friend in 3 distinct friends who didn’t know at the time that he was using them.
I know that almost everyone I know would rush to my aid. I am so blessed. Many have showed up in various ways and will continue to do so. I’m thankful for each one and I know too that God has orchestrated it, at just the right time. But I wanted to express how quickly and directly Jesus responded to my cry this week when I didn’t know how or where to turn. He took over and organized it, even planning it out before I knew I would need it. That’s our amazing God!
You can always run to Jesus, Jesus Strong and Kind.
Jesus Strong and Kind - see the video
Jesus said that if I thirst
I should come to Him
No one else can satisfy
I should come to Him
Jesus said, if I am weak
I should come to Him
No one else can be my strength
I should come to Him
For the Lord is good and faithful
He will keep us day and night
We can always run to Jesus
Jesus, strong and kind
Jesus said that if I fear
I should come to Him
No one else can be my shield
I should come to Him
For the Lord is good and faithful
He will keep us day and night
We can always run to Jesus
Jesus, strong and kind
Jesus said, if I am lost
He will come to me
And He showed me on that cross
He will come to me
For the Lord is good and faithful
He will keep us day and night
We can always run to Jesus
Jesus, strong and kind
For the Lord is good and faithful
He will keep us day and night
We can always run to Jesus
Jesus, strong and kind
Jesus, strong and kind
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